Death gives us more to be concerned about than just leaving the planet.  While most of us acknowledge that our days are numbered, none of us have any idea how, when or where our own death will occur.  Few of us acknowledge this certain event but do all we can to avoid anything having to do with it.  In his commencement address to Stanford University students five years ago, Apple icon Steve Jobs informed students what most of us know, if we are honest,—that no one wants to die and that even people who want to go to heaven (that would be us) don’t want to die to get there.

Because I’m taking a class on bereavement, death and dying—I call it "Bummer Class"— I’ve learned  that talking about death won’t kill us and that we can to some extent  be better prepared.  Think about it—the wise among us spend time and money preparing for every other of life’s big events:  I heard recently that wedding planners advise brides and grooms-in-waiting to expect a two-year period of time for wedding preparation (I’d elope); couples engage in childbirth education classes for six to eight weeks in order to at least feel somewhat prepared for delivery (and it is pain, guys—not just pressure).  We do well to prepare for events that will change our lives forever.  Why would we not prepare similarly for the unavoidable day ahead—a day that will change our lives and the lives of those closest to us?

So how do we prepare to exit this life and move on to the next? The first item of business is to be reconciled to God through Jesus Christ our Lord.  If you don’t know what being reconciled to God is or don’t know how to go about it, get in touch with one of West Shore's staff members or elders.  Reconciliation is primary in our preparation for death; in comparison, the rest is cake.

My 94-year-old mother in-law recently purchased all that will be necessary for her funeral; that’s a gift to her family and opportunity for her to acknowledge that in time she and her family will need the services she is purchasing.  It’s also important to know the help that is available to those facing the end of life because of illness.  And it’s crucial to come to terms with the death event ourselves in order to be of help to others who are facing theirs. So basically, this kind of preparation means living as close to the truth about life and death as possible.

Sometimes the most difficult part of this kind of preparation is just beginning the conversation, so we’re making a stab to begin this very conversation.  On November 16, Casey Hurst, chaplain at Grane Hospice Care in Lemoyne, will explain the help that’s available through Hospice services.  In the months to come we’ll consider the experience of loss and ways to walk with those who have suffered significant loss.

Talking about death won’t kill us, but it might actually help prepare us to live more deeply and make us deeper, wider, more courageous people equipped to assist others in need.